"Listen up bub! I'm gonna punch you in the eye!"
"Don't do that, else it will be really bad."
"And why not scumbag?"
"Cos I've got contacts"
The bully got a little scared and left him alone.
He did not realise that the class nerd was talking about his contact lenses, and how being punched in the eye would a really bad mess for himself because of the contact lenses
**This was an impromptu joke Stupidosaur made up when there was this 'team farewell party' our ex-Project Manager gave since he has moved out of the project . The P.M. donning the usual role of giving fundas on 'soft skills' uttered something about 'eye contact' with the waiter. This was of course promptly taken up by his supervisor, the Delivery Manager and converted into something like 'Look into my eyes' kinda 'romantic' thing with the waiter joke.
While everyone was guffawing over this, the internal feedback loops of Stupidosaur filtered in just the 'eye contact' part and added 'lenses' to it, with the above insignificant disastrous result.
And the climax of the afternoon was when the P.M. paid waiter the bill. He was given 20% 'corporate discount' on our 'company party' bill. The most notable about this, that sent additonal rounds of guffaws all around was that in the last party (which team gave the ex-PM) held at the same venue, we were given only 10% discount. The 'eye contact' seemed to have worked!**